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An online diary of someone who tends to forget easily.

MDS Pickup Lines

Sen. Miriam Defensor Santiago Pickup Lines/Jokes


Para fair ang labanan sa susunod magpadala tayo ng interpreter sa Ms. Universe. Ipadala natin si Senator Miriam Defensor-Santiago. Pwede na rin si Kuya Kim Atienza para may kaunting trivia.

Kung magkakaroon ako ng sariling planeta, gusto ko ikaw ang axis nito, para sayo lang iikot ang mundo ko.

Sana FB status ka na lang, para pwede kitang i-like.

Ibenta mo na bahay mo, total nandidito ka na, nakatira sa puso ko.

Sana naka-off ang ilaw, para tayo na lang mag-on.

Noodles ka ba, kasi Lucky Me?

Parang see-saw, pag wala ka, down ako.

Para kang hold-upper, lahat ibibigay ko sayo, wag mo lang akong saktan.

Galing mo din, ano? Di mo pa ko binabato tinamaan mo na ako.

Maglaro tayo ng kahit ano, wag lang taguan, kasi a girl like you is hard to find.

Sana exam mo na lang ako, para sagutin mo rin ako.

Bastos ka rin, ano? Di ka man lang nagpapaalam tuloy-tuloy kang pumasok sa puso ko.

Google ka ba? Lahat kasi ng hinahanap ko sayo ko natagpuan.

Nakalimutan ko pangalan mo, eh. Pwede bang tawagin na lang kitang… akin?

Nakalunok ka ba ng kwitis, kasi pag ngumiti ka, may spark

Sana ikaw ang cardiologist ko, para ikaw ang mag-aalaga sa puso ko.

Sana scientist ako, para ikaw naman ang lab ko.

Tindera ka ba ng yosi? Kasi you give me Hope… and More.

Para kang cactus, kasi handa akong masaktan, mayakap ka lang.

Pag wala ka ang buhay ko parang lapis na hindi natasahan: pointless.

Let’s go to Q&A.

Q: Pano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba siya na hindi siya mababastos?
A: Excuse me, Miss, Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?

GUY 1: May sagot ka ba sa exam?
GUY 2: Puro blanko.
GUY 1: Patay.
GUY 2: Bakit?
GUY 1: Baka isipin nila nagkopyahan tayo.


Di ko sinasabing maganda ako. Sinasabi ko lang, pangit ka.

Pag nakikita kita, parang gusto kong magsorry sa mga mata ko.

Wife: Ibili mo ako ng bagong bra.
Husband: Wag ka ng mag-bra, maliit naman boobs mo.
Wife: Eh bakit ikaw, nagbebrief ka pa?

When someone told me, ‘Ang ganda mo’ I answered ‘Sana ikaw rin.’

In a 
swimming pool:
Classmate
 1: I’m sure lulutang ka.
Classmate 2: Bakit? Dahil payat ako?
Classmate 1: Hindi, dahil plastic ka.

When the cashier at the grocery said, “Miss, pwedeng candy na lang ang sukli ko sa iyo?” I answered “Bakit, tsokolate ba ang ibinayad ko?”
Masasabi mo bang bobo ako
Kung ikaw lang naman ang laman ng utak ko
Sana magkasama tayo sa pila para
Pag may sumigaw ng “next” at hindi mo narinig
Tatanungin mo na agad ako kung “Tayo naba?”
Ako na ang magbabayad ng tuition fee mo
Pag aralan mo lang na mahalin ako
Pangalan mo palang kinikilig na ako
Pano pa kaya kung magka apelyido na tayo?
Ang pag ibig ay parang ketchup,
matamis pero maraming nakiki sawsaw
Straw ka ba?
Kasi sipsip ka na plastic ka pa
Sources:

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Praybeyt Benjamin Fever

Pag kinikilig, in love agad? Di ba pwedeng naiihi muna?!

Pag mahaba ang hair ligawin na agad? Di ba pwedeng Sadako muna?! 

Pag malaki boobs Ethel agad? Di ba pwedeng Carlos Agassi muna?!

Pag red lips Anne Curtis agad? Di ba pwedeng Joker muna?!

Pag mahaba ang mga biyas supermodel na agad? Di ba pwedeng lastikman muna?!

Pag maputi ang lalaki Edward Cullen na agad? Di ba pwedeng Casper muna ?!

Pag nagbigay ng bulaklak nanliligaw na? Di ba pwedeng nakikiramay muna?!

Pag nagsusuka, buntis agad? Di ba pwedeng nakita ka lang muna?

Pag adik, sa drugs na agad? Di ba pwedeng sa'yo muna?!

Pag walang kibo, behaved na agad? Di ba pwedeng comatose muna?!

Pag ba makulimlim ulap agad? Di ba pwedeng kilikili muna?!

Pag lawlaw ang pantalon hiphop na agad? Di ba pwedeng luslos muna?! 

Pag payat ang babae model na agad? Di ba pwedeng may TB muna?!

Pag hot yung babae sexy na agad? Di ba pwedeng may dengue muna?!

Pag balakangin, Jollibee agad? Di ba pwedeng Bituin Escalante muna?! 

Pag nagpapautang, Bumbay agad? Di ba pwede Cebuana Lhuillier muna?!

Pag di nakatulog, may insomnia na agad? Di ba pwedeng iniisip ka muna?!

Pag mapula ang mata, aswang na agad? Di ba pwedeng may sore eyes muna?!

Pag di pinansin, hindi na mahal agad? Di ba pwedeng nag papa-miss muna?!

Pag abnormal Budoy na kagad? Di ba pwedeng ikaw muna?! 

Pag lalaki naka-make up, bakla agad? Di ba pwdeng clown muna?!

Pag namumula ang mukha, blushing agad? Di ba pwedeng nasampal lang muna?!

Pag nawawala, Elisa na agad? Di ba pwedeng Ramona muna?!

Pag gwapo, sa iyo na agad? Di ba pwedeng pumila ka muna?!

Pag maraming chicks, babaero agad? Di ba pwedeng friendly muna?!

Pag walang Boyfriend panget agad? Di ba pwedeng choosy muna?!

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Vice Ganda Jokes

Vice Ganda JokesQuotes and Lines


Nakakita siya ng guwapo, di nakapagpigil
Vice: Hi, ano pangalan mo?
Gwapo: Ako po?
Vice: Hindi sila, may nakikita ka pa bang tao? Malamang ikaw, ang tanga.

Sa gasoline station, pagbaba nya ng window
Gas boy: Magpapagas po?
Vice: Hindi magpapaconfine ako. Malamang magpapagas, gasolinahan ‘to 'di ba? Alangan magpaconfine ako dito, tapos dextrose ko 'yung unleaded 
gasoline niyo, at ayun na yung ikakamatay ko.

Sumakay siya ng jeep na walang laman papuntang palengke
Vice: Manong bayad po.
Manong1: Ilan ‘to?
Vice: Ay manong dalawa yan, nakakahiya kasi sayo, kahit ako 
lang mag-isa sakay mo, dalawa na ibabayad ko, libre na kita kahit sayo 'tong jeep.

Bababa na sya
Vice: Manong, para.
Manong1: Bababa ka na?
Vice: Ay hindi manong, sasakay ako. Sasakay ako ulit, dun naman ako sa bubong, mas presko kasi dun.

2nd attempt
Vice: Para ho.
Manong1: Dyan ba sa tabi?
Vice: Ay hindi manong. Dun ako sa gitna, sa gitna para masagasaan ako.

Binaba siya sa gitna
Vice mabundol ng isa pang jeep…
Manong2: Nasaktan ka ba?
Vice: (naasar) Ay hindi, nag-enjoy ako. Ulitin natin, bunguin mo pa. Isa pa! Dali! Ang sarap kasi! Nakabundol ka tapos itatanong mo kung masakit? Ikaw kaya bundulin ko? Tapos i-share mo skin feelings mo, kaya na-enjoy mo, sige magbungguan tayo. Laruin natin, ipauso natin, bunggu-bungguan.

Sa Opisina
Vice: Pasok mo nga dito yung mga papeles ko..
Assistant: Sir saan ko ipapasok , dito sa loob"?
Vice: Hinde sa labas, ipasok nga diba.pwede bang ipasok sa labas, sige nga subukang 
mong ipasok doon sa labas

Another Day
Kararating lang sa opisina
Assistance: Hi. good morning po ser nandito na po pala kayo.
Vice: Hinde wala pa, picture ko lang toh, hindi pa ako to.

Naospital yung pamangkin, kasi buntis (dinugo)...
Pumuntang emergency room:
Vice: Nurse tulong!
Nurse: Ano pong nangyayari? Manganganak?
Vice: Ay hinde, ipapatira ko pa lang.dinudugo na nga diba. Syempre manganganak na

2nd Attempt
Vice: Bilisan mo na!
Nurse: Ano pong gusto niyo? Tawagin ko si dok?
Vice: Hinde ako na kaya ko na toh! Doon na lang kayo, baka nakakaabala pa ako sa inyo!

3rd Attempt
Tagal ng doctor..
Vice: Yung ulo ng bata lumabas na!
Nurse: (nagtatakbo) Ay ano yan ulo ng bata?
Vice: Hindi ulo ng **** ng bata..bwiset

Patay Tatay
Vice umiiyak sa harap ng kabao ng tatay
Dumating si bestfriend, hinimas-himas yung likod ni Vice
Best friend: Uy, okey ka lang?
Vice: Ikaw hayop ka, patayin ko tatay mo? Okey ka lang!?
Vice: ********* ka tatay ko nasa kabao, tapos tatanungin mo ko kung okey ka lang!
Vice: okey lang ako, ako pumatay eh..bigtime! success patay na eh.. nasan tatay mo sunod na naten?! Para okey ka den!

Vice papuntang fastfood
Vice: (Umupo)
Waiter: Gud afternun po! Kakain po kayo?
Vice: Hindi, magluluto, tutulungan ko chef nyo.. Kakahiya naman nakiupo ako dito tapos hindi pa ko tutulong.. Bilis na.. Gusto mo tulungan pa kita sa mga 
customers nyo.. Tapos aasenso business nyo.. Edi masaya, di ba? Umunlad na kayo, nagutom pa ko.. Ang galing noh?

Vice nakaupo sa park.. Walang nakaupo sa ibang upuan..
Manong: Pwede po bang umupo dito?
Vice: Hindi, tinatalunan yan.. Nakikita mo di ba, ang daming nakaupo.. Mamaya tatalunan ko yan.. Tapos sabay nating gagawin.. Sama na rin natin yung mga dumadaan.. Para mukha tayong mga baliw lahat.. Bilis na, simulan mo na.. Maya-maya lang susunod ako.


Vice Ganda Quotes

“A Goal is a Dream with a Deadline”
“A dream without action is a Wish”
“Ambaho mo wala kang PERSONAL HYGIENE. Kung ikaw lang din magiging jowa ko mamamatay nalang akong VIRGIN.”


Vice Ganda Lines and Punchlines

Q: Sinong gusto mo, si Dora o so Winnie the Pooh?
A: Si Dora.. The rat killer.

Q: Sino po bang mas maganda, ikaw o si Cinderella?
A: Hindi ko alam, pero ang alam ko mas maganda ako kay 
Lion King.

Q: Bakit hindi ko mabilang yung buhok ko?
A: Kaya mo yan. Magtiis ka lang.

Q: Tuli ka na ba Vice?
A: Oo, baket gusto mo yung balat ibibigay ko sayo.

Q: Sinong pinaka unang bakla sa mundo?
A: Baka yung ahas, kase sinisilipan niya si Adan.

Lola: Lagi akong nanunuod sa iyo....
Vice Ganda: So sinusumbat nyu po po sakin yan? Joke lang po!

Q: Paano nyo po malalaman kung babae o lalake yung nasa loob ng CR?
A: Edi abangan mong lumabas.

Q: Sino pong kamukha nyong artista?
A: Dawn Zulueta. Walang kaisip isip

Q: Kapag inaya ka ni Manny 
Pacquiao na magboxing, papayag ka?
A: Pag inaya kang makipaglaplapan ni Aling Dionisia papayag ka?

Q: Anong gagawin mo kung napajebs ka sa underwear mo habang nagjujudge ka sa showtime?
A: Edi isasample ko sa mukha mo.

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Is Piolo gay?

Is Piolo's reaction normal for a guy watching Manny Pacquiao's fight? 
Is that really normal?!^^v

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Cold + Flu? -_-

These images describes my health condition! Runny nose, teary eyes, dry cough... I hate it! >.< 



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I miss my bangs!

I miss my bangs! I want to try this kind of bangs but I don’t know if it will look good on me :))


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Gift Ideas for Ghee

What I like to receive:
1. Clothes (Tops, Shorts): Tops - anything that's not too revealing/sexy is fine. I don't like bright colors like apple green, hot pink, bright yellow, etc. I like cardigans/bolero or whatever you call it, puffed sleeve blouse, simple sleeveless top that can be matched with a bolero/cardigan, simple top.. Shorts: Waist - 26 ^^


2. Pillows: I love soft and big pillows! Stuffed toys are fine but I can't always hug them because they're so fluffy!


3. Bags: I love Secosana bags. :)


4. Accessories (Earrings): Simple earrings will do. ^^


5. Flowers: Roses! Any color is fine...but Pink and Yellow roses are cute :))


6. Greeting Cards/Letters: As long as there is a message that is personally written by the sender. :)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What I don't like to receive:
1. Sandals/Shoes: I'm afraid it won't fit my little feet and it's really difficult finding one that will really match my size. I like simple and comfortable sandals/shoes, but trust me when I say 'It will take HOURS before I find something that I will like'. Plus there's a superstitious belief that if you give these to someone, some says that person will walk away from you, or your relationship will be affected in a bad way. IDK if it's true, but I don't like giving or receiving sandals/shoes as gifts.


2. Food: As much as possible I want to have something that I can use or keep, that way, whenever I look at that thing, it will remind me of the person who gave it to me. 


3. Pants: Same reason with no. 1, it might not good look on me unless I tried it before buying it.


Hmm, I guess that's all. I could not think of other things that I don't like receiving as gifts. Do I look like a choosy girl who demands of what she wants to get? Haha.. :p


I'm not really used in receiving gifts especially when it's my birthday. I wrote this entry because Gyun-Wo asked me what I want to receive for my birthday on Dec. 31. Well, to give you an idea on what I like and what I don't, here it is. Hehe.. I don't want to require anyone to give me gifts when it's my birthday. I don't also demand of what they should give me. It's up to them, as long as they have a great explanation on why they are giving me that gift (if there is any) hehe.. I'll appreciate whatever it is. 


His birthday is on December 12 and I'm planning in giving him something as a gift. Whether he likes it or not, he said he will use it. Haha! :p


BTW, we also talked about having a simple bday party with our colleagues next month! Haha! It's better if we'll have it a day before our Christmas vacation. :)

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I love FY!

Here are some of the photos of my fave anime Fushigi Yuugi ^^







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Lola found Lolo! :)


MANILA, Philippines - Aurelia Matias is still on cloud nine a day after she finally found her missing 78-year-old husband, Luis.

She spent almost two weeks roaming around the city, with two "missing person" posters of her husband pinned on the front and back of her dress.

"Kung ano ang sakit na nararamdaman ko nung nawala siya, ganun din ang nararamdaman kong kaligayahan. Di ko kayang sabihin," Aurelia told radio dzMM on Wednesday.

"Maligayang maligaya ako at natagpuan ko ang asawa ko. Buong pamilya namin natuwa nang makita [siya]," she added.

Luis, who is already "ulyanin" (an old person who is forgetful and repetitious), said he survived by eating food given to him by women working in restaurants.

He seemed oblivious to the fact that his wife went to great lengths to look for him, something that was probably caused by old age.

But Aurelia didn't seem to mind.

"Ang importante ay magkasama kaming muli," she said.

They then gave each other a big hug.

Love story
Aurelia, with a little help from Luis, then shared their decades-old love story.
It was sometime in the 1950s. Aurelia was a Bisaya who worked as a house helper in Manila and stayed with her relatives.

She met Luis, who serenaded her with songs by Nat King Cole and Tom Jones. He then asked Aurelia to go away with him.

They had a relationship. Aurelia got pregnant at age 19.

"Noong magbuntis ako, inuwi ako sa bahay nila. Doon kami nagpakasal (civil wedding)," Aurelia said.

By the time they had their second child, which was in the 1960s, Aurelia and Luis got married in a church in España, Manila.

Today, two of their nine children have already passed away. Aurelia praised Luis for being a great father and husband despite occasionally giving in to temptation.

"Oo [nagmahal siya ng iba]. Di ko siya kilala. Pero wala na yun," she said.

Theirs is a love that knows no distance and old age. Aurelia admitted that she almost lost hope in finding her husband, but it was her love for Luis that kept her going.

"Mahal na mahal ko siya. Di ko kaya abutin, basta ang mahalaga, mahal ko siya."
Luis, for his part, said, "Sa hirap at ginhawa, magkasama kami."

Twitter fans
Several Filipino netizens were teary-eyed after finding out about Aurelia and Luis on television and the Internet.

"Lola Aurelia" became one of the top trending local topics on Twitter on Wednesday afternoon.

Below are some of the messages for the reunited couple on the microblogging site:
"Lola Aurelia and Lolo Luis - such a touching story," broadcast journalist Ces Oreña-Drilon tweeted.

"Lola Aurelia & Lolo Luis: Thank you for reminding the world what true love is. That a great marriage is way different from a great wedding," user balintatao wrote.

"Lola Aurelia helped me believe that unconditional love does exist," user Melanie Cruz Legaspi wrote.

"That Lola Aurelia-Lolo Luis kinda love, they don't do it like that anymore. A love that always finds a way," user Tech Pinas wrote.

Video: Youtube/GMA News
Information: ABS-CBN News

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You guys don't know...

You, guys, don’t know everything we, girls, do for you. 

You, guys, don’t know that we, girls, find everything related to you: lyrics, quotes, movies - everything. 


You, guys, don’t know that we, girls, could stay up late in the night just to wait for you to be online and talk for a while. 


You, guys, don’t know how we, girls, feel when you say you’ve got to go, and the “Goodbye part” begins. 


You, guys, have no idea of how many fights we, girls, could have had with our parents or friends just to go out or talk to you. 


You, guys, don’t know that we, girls, walk a little faster or take different ways at school just to make it an accidentally way to say “Hi”. 


You, guys, don’t know that we, girls, can talk about you with anyone and not get bored. 


You, guys, don’t know how we, girls, can find lovely and cute every single detail of you.

You, guys, won’t ever know how, we, girls, feel just when we see you smiling, even if we are not the reason. 


You, guys, don’t know why we, girls, try to hide our feelings with you. 


You, guys, have no idea of how much we, girls, would give up or leave behind for you. 


You, guys, won’t ever know how we, girls, could have passed through tears and pain, just to be okay with you. 


You, guys, won’t ever understand why we, girls, are so complicated… well it’s because of you, guys. 


You, guys, have no idea of how much we, girls, love you. 


We, girls, feel identified with all this… and it’s all because of you, guys.

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When I met you...

I used to be like this for almost 4 years...


then I met you...


2nd Photo:
I was shy at the same time kinikilig in this picture because Gyun-Wo tried to watch while my friend is taking this! (Di nya alam crush ko na sya noon pa! ^^,)

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Cute Tumblr Images


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Cute Persian Kittens











I want to have a very cute Persian kitten! I’ll have one, someday! :))

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Cute Maltese Puppies






I saw these cute pictures of Maltese puppies on Web and I just want to share them on my blog. These are sooooo cute! ^^

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Childish Dreams

When I'm still a kid I was inspired to be a WITCH because of the TV Show entitled ' The Worst Witch! I remember searching about witchcraft and looking for a Book of Spells in Book Stores! Haha! I was really serious that time. I want to learn different spells and to fly with a broom! Whenever I think about it now that I've matured, I can't help but laugh. The TV Show really influenced me to have a dream of becoming a WITCH! ^^


Aside from the witchy stuffs I want to learn, I also wonder how is it like to be a VAMPIRE. Haha.. Oh well, this curiousity is the result of watching my favorite TV series 'The Vampire Diaries'. I want to look YOUNG forever. I like watching the scenes when a human that was bitten by a vamp is transitioning into a vampire. It's cool. Haha.. :P


See how TV can really affect someone like me? Funny isn't it? Haha!


That's it. I just want to share my childish dreams in this post. Time to work. Hehe. I wish it's already Friday! :P

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Sweet Note :)

“It’s not about finding someone who won’t fight with you or make you sad, or mad. It’s about finding the person who will still be standing there wiping the tears away, holding you in the arms after a fight and the one who will never leave, no matter how hard things can get.”


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Saying 'I Love You'...

My bad mood was triggered by something today so I decided to search for something that will explain how I feel. I found a great poem and it's perfect! Here it is...

When I Tell You That I Love You...


When I tell you that I love you...
I'm telling that I care..
in you I've found a best friend
that is wonderful and rare


When I tell you that I love you...
that meaning is so profound
for,in you my faith has been uncovered
and my soul finally found


When I tell you that I love you...
what I'm trying to express
is that you can always count on me,
I'll give you nothing but the best


When i tell you that i love you..
I'm trying to convey
how much i admire you
in thousand different ways


When i tell you that I love you...
I'm saying thank you for being who you are
for being a part of my life 
and touching my heart


When I tell you that I love you...
It's not exactly what i mean
to explain what i feel for you
would take a zillion words
not three......


When I tell you I love you...
I dont say it out of habit or to make conversation 
i say it to remind you 
that you're the best thing that ever happened to me...


[This part is my personal composition haha.. This part is mine.. I wrote it for you..]
When I tell you I Love You
that doesn't mean I need a reply to tell me that you love me too
I just want you to always remember that I Love You
and I'll always will.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
GHEE:
I don't like it when ''I love you'' is said in a way that requires a reply. I also don't like asking if I love you, it's like you're questioning my love for you. Am I being so negative here? I guess I'm just being Moody.. I LOVE YOU :)



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Childhood Hairstyles

These are the 4 hairstyles Mom used to do for me when I’m still a kid. (Headband, Braid, Pigtails, and Ponytail) ^^,


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I'm going to meet U


[4Men] 그댈 만나러 갑니다 (by MJLucifer)
----------------------------------------
Finally I know now the title and singer of the song that I heard yesterday from a Tumblr blog I followed. Good thing she (owner of the Tumblr account - cutesyworld) replied to my message. I like listening to this song. The English title is 'I'm going to meet you'

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My Human Diary...

When I was alone and Single for almost 4 years, I have a blog that kept all my secrets and my stories since I had no one to talk to because I don't want to bother my friends and family with my endless drama. I used to think it will be like that for a long period of time... then I found you! Now, it's quite difficult to write about what happened in my life because I find it more interesting to share it with you. Oh well, I still share some on my blog since we're both forgetful! Haha! It feels good that aside from having a blog which is my online diary, I also have someone with whom I can share anything, especially those that I can't share with anyone but him. I know that my secrets are safe with YOU! ^^v


I don't know what title can I use for this post. I just saw a quote and used it as my inspiration in writing this one. Is 'Human Diary' okay? Haha! Whatever! I'm not really good in using Title that match the content of my posts. :p

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Swings and Hammocks

While I'm sleepy I decided to check on different styles of swings. I want to have a cozy swing and hammock in my house someday. Having such describes how sleepyhead I can be at times. :p


***HAMMOCKS***




***SWINGS***








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I can wear these...

Fashion Style/Clothing is one of the things I like to search when I'm web browsing. I want to learn how to mix and match to come up with a comfy, simple, and new fashion style that I can wear. Usually I wear jeans, Capri pants, or shorts mixed with a simple blouse, sometimes I want to try wearing skirts but it's scary to do that especially in our country. I love simple tops and cardigans! 


Here are the photos that caught my attention while browsing. Credits to http://cherichictopia.tumblr.com.



























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